Promises..

Sigh.

I found myself staring at my handphone the whole day. My eyes only left it when I went to play frisbee. As I am staring the blue cloudy sky at the fitness corner did it make me realise something. I should not be waiting for something that wont be here anymore.

Now I am back home, I continued staring at the house phone. Perhaps some part of me just wished that I would received another call from you. But I know it isn't going to be possible anymore.

There are many times when I tried calling you when you did not call. But it is either engaged or no one is answering. Hence I learnt to wait. It has became somewhat a habit and now it's over.

I need a cold turkey. I need to stop staring at my phone. I need to stop thinking about things. I need to stop everything.

I am sorry for being a burden to you since year 2008 starts and I shall try my very best to stay away from your life from now on. I'm like a stone that you have given up and felt so relieved of.
As for me, I shall just try to disappear from the Earth and stop being a nuisance.


On my way home today, I almost got run down by a vehicle. Cant really remember what it is. But luckily I manage to pull myself away before it reaches the spot I was standing a few seconds ago. Maybe if I really got hit by the vehicle, it might be a good thing to get rid of me.

Huimin told me that if I am upset over this, it shows that I am reluctant to let go. It's true but I still have to do so. Isn't it?

I tried to make myself busy today trying to not to think anything negative. But in free times like this, it doesn't help at all. Perhaps I should just try to fall asleep and to stop all the tears from flowing out.

Tomorrow would be the day filled with either tears or joys. But no matter what, nothing is going to make me happy for long.

Promises are just meant to be broken and not kept.

That should be all...